🧩 Thanks for keeping Life's a Game Free!
When I was a startup founder, I feel like I saw Mercury everywhere. Mercury is the banking* product that does more... like credit cards**, invoicing, cash flow management, and working capital, all in one place. As I grew my solopreneur business I realized I needed to diversify my banking as well and realized Mercury is just as powerful for solopreneurs/consultants. I love anything that makes handling my finances faster and easier, so I finally decided to try it — spoiler alert, I never thought I’d call a banking interface “beautiful,” but that day has arrived. More on that later.
In the meantime, definitely give Mercury a spin yourself with this cool tutorial.
♟️ MY TURN:
For those of you following along, the past 6 months have included getting a puppy, buying a house, renovating a house, moving into a house while juggling two working parents and three kids with busy schedules.
It can be easy to let life take over.
And then, years later, you look at your partner as a roommate or coparent and struggle to see the same person you used to flirt with, date and have fun with.
At least that was my experience in my first marriage.
So I’ve examined this very closely to ensure I don’t make the same choices again.
In my upcoming book I talk about the different roles we play in life and how it’s important to identify, separate and honor each of the roles.
Intentional imbalance > Trying to find alignment between them all.
This is because each role has different, competing goals.
Who I am as a parent is different than who I am as a partner is different than who I am as a founder/CEO.
The same goes for relationships.
Who I am with my partner when we are coordinating pick-ups, dinners and grocery shopping..
(co-parents)
Is different than…
who I am with my partner when we are talking about house renovations, to-dos and deliveries.
(roommates)
is different than…
who I am with my partner when we are out together, joking, flirting and dreaming together.
(dating)
Is this resonating?
YES – all of these roles make up the larger PARTNER role but I find it imperative to acknowledge each of these roles.
It can be easy to let one of the sub-roles take over so we follow a partner operating rhythm to ensure we acknowledge and create space for each of them.
♟️ YOUR TURN:
Today I’m going to share the 4 part operating rhythm we use to create space for the different roles we play as a couple.
Annual:
- Kid free vacation – 1x a year we take a kid-free vacation. I acknowledge this is easier with a co-parenting schedule with my ex but I would recommend it at least for a weekend if you can.
I didn't leave my first baby until she was almost 3....and....well....we all know how that relationship went.
The ability to be kid-free, stress-free and task-free helps to keep a playful dynamic between you both.
- Semi-Annual Planning & Budget Day – 2x a year we sit down and plan out the rest of the trips, projects and work coming up.
This ensures we understand who is going to be pushing hard and when.
For example, my book tour kicks off in Q3 so Dan is scaling back on consulting work to ensure he can cover at home.
Weekly:
- Sunday Scheduling - Every Sunday night we plan a roommate / co-parenting meeting to review the needs for the week and divide and conquer.
Everything goes into our google calendar.
This is the logistics-only, no frill conversation that needs to happen but tends to seep into the times of the week when we are in different modes.
- Wednesday Date Night – Every Wednesday we set everything down and go out to dinner.
It allows us the mid-week moment to breathe and create space to just be two people dating. We make it a rule to not talk logistics.
We didn't prioritize this in my first marriage and I know it created more cracks in the foundation over the 13 years together.
If you acknowledge and create space for the different roles you play together, you will thrive through all of them.
I hope this helps!!
So thankful to be in a partnership with another ambitious human. ❤️
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*Mercury is a financial technology company, not a bank. Banking services provided through Choice Financial Group, Column N.A., and Evolve Bank & Trust; Members FDIC.
**Credit card: The IO Card is issued by Patriot Bank, Member FDIC, pursuant to a license from Mastercard®.