- 3 things most people avoid
- A fun new career announcement
- Two important rules of life
If there is one thing I've learned in my career........
Most people don’t miss out because they lack talent. They miss out because they’re waiting to be picked.
We’ve been taught a quiet rule about opportunity:
Be impressive.
Be patient.
Wait for someone to see it.
But real career breakthroughs usually don’t happen that way.
They happen when you do three things most people avoid:
- You put yourself in the room.
- You prove value before you’re “official”
- You ask for what you want.
If you want a different life, you can’t keep playing by invisible rules written for someone else.
♟️ MY TURN:
By now some of you may have heard the announcement from last month.
I’m excited to share that I’m officially the CMO of Reale Actives - a new acne-prone skincare line founded by Alix Earle, which officially launched March 31st.
For those new here, I want to share the journey that brought me here....not because my resume is special, but because the lesson is universal:
You have to make your own opportunities.
Here’s the quick arc:
In 2007, I graduated from the University of Illinois with a marketing degree.
My accounting TA asked me if I'd be willing to take an internship in College while going to college in Champaign-Urbana. So I took it.
From 2008–2010, I worked at Ernst & Young in Chicago as a marketer.
I put it out to my boss that I wanted to move to NYC and she found a role for me.
In 2010, I was introduced to a celebrity wedding planner and asked to manage his brand and plan weddings.
A friend invited me to be a part of a non profit leadership board so I joined.
In 2013, I launched a tech startup in the wedding industry because a serial entrepreneur from the non profit board pitched me on the idea.
In 2015, the founder of The Knot saw me at a female pitch night and asked if I wanted to come blend my knowledge of weddings + tech...... where I went on to lead brand marketing for five years.
In 2018, a VC that I had pitched previously asked me to come in and workshop a few companies he was incubating.
In 2020, I left to launch House of Wise, a D2C company built to help women create space for sleep, sex, stress, and strength after a conversation with that same VC leading with a $400k check to get it started.
In 2023, I sold House of Wise to a cannabis marketing agency and stepped away.
And then came the hardest part for any ambitious person:
The blank page.
I had no clue what was next.
So I did what I always do when I need traction:
I started writing.
I started teaching.
I said yes to various opportunities
I built a coaching business around marketing.
I wrote a USA Today bestselling book.
I wasn’t “waiting for clarity.”
I just started doing things.
Some took off.
Others didn’t.
I had several projects flop during this period.
But momentum has a funny way of introducing you to your next chapter.
In July of last year, I was grabbing coffee with a VC friend and she asked if I was open to a gig to help think through a celeb-founded D2C business.
I took on what I assumed was a 3-month consulting gig to help build out go-to-market strategy.
I wasn’t looking for a full-time role.
But then I quickly realized I wanted this one.
The mission is about empowering people to feel confident and sexy in their reale skin hit home.
The products made my skin more consistent with fewer hormonal breakouts.
The team is brilliant.
The founder is down to earth, grateful, deeply involved, and incredibly smart about marketing.
There was only one problem......
I was about to go on a six-week book tour!!!
The obvious, reasonable story in my head was:
“There’s no way they’d want a CMO who’s on the road every week promoting her own book.”
That’s where most people stop.
They pre-reject themselves.
They become their own first no.
But I asked anyway.
And it led to my now full-time role.
A dream job.
That moment reminded me of two rules I keep learning again and again as I play this game called life:
Rule 1: Stop playing by others’ rules
The most limiting rules are the ones no one says out loud:
“Don’t be inconvenient”
“Don’t ask too soon.”
“Don’t want too much.”
“Don’t build a life that looks “too complex” to explain”.
Those rules weren’t built for the life I’m here to create.
Rule 2: Don’t be the first no
If you want more doors to open, you have to stop closing them on yourself.
You don’t need more confidence. You need more reps at asking for what you want despite the narratives playing in your head from Rule #1.
♟️ YOUR TURN:
If you’re craving your next opportunity but it hasn’t appeared yet, you might not need a massive reinvention.
You might just need a different approach.
Here’s a simple playbook:
1. Get in proximity
You can’t be chosen for rooms you’re not in.
2. Prove value in small ways
Short contracts. Advisory support. A test project.
3. Make the ask
The right people can’t help you if they don’t know what you want.
Clarity is a gift you give others that helps you in return.
4. Don't be the first no
This is where most people stop. They are waiting for perfect timing.
So let me ask you…..
Where are you pre-rejecting yourself right now?
What are you assuming is a no…..without ever asking the question?
This week, pick one thing you want.
One room you want closer to.
One conversation you’ve been delaying.
And make the ask.
Because the people who get the most out of life aren’t lucky.....
they’re the ones willing to stop being their own first no.
PS I will still be writing this newsletter and book #2. It's become my passion and outlet. See you next Thursday!