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Perhaps womanhood is more nuanced than a headline allows.

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♟️ MY TURN:

For the last two months my FYP has been sizzling with hot takes over Emma Grede’s takes on how to be successful as a working woman.

It doesn’t help that traditional media loves to deduce nuanced thoughts into tantalizing, click bait headlines.

Top headlines have incldued:

am no where near the level of an Emma Grede but as someone who openly shares and talks about being a working woman, juggling ambition for my career and ambition to be a great mom and wife - I want to share my own hot takes that I wish more of the world could embrace.
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Hot take #1: Womanhood is seasonal

There are intense seasons of pushing in your career and putting everything else on the back burner. There are intense seasons of family where someone in your life requires more attention from you.

What I think Emma is missing from her narrative is sharing what downshifts look like for her (even in the day, week or in larger seasons of her life).

Hot take #2: You have to make sacrifices in the seasons of pushing.

We need to stop pretending otherwise. After I sold House of Wise, I was home a lot more.

Focused on the kids. Volunteering for class trips.

Right now?

Writing book number two while leading marketing at a fast-growing startup?

I have more support.

I miss more things.

I see my kids less than I did in that last chapter.

And neither one makes me a better or worse mother.

Hot take #3: You have to spend money to make money.

This is the part people love to skip over.

I once met an author who had made the NYT bestseller list. She had secured a $1m book deal and spent $750k of that on launching the book - including hiring a ghost writer. As someone who wrote every single word of my book and still spent the entirety of my advance on the book launch (aka I made $0 from writing that book), I realized something. It is a lot easier to make money and be successful when you have money to spend. Without my advance, I don’t think I would have made a best seller list.

It is a lot easier to “have it all” when you already have a lot.

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​Hot take #4: Support systems are not cheating. They are strategy.

Nannies.

Housekeepers.

Babysitters.

Meal delivery.

A partner who actually pulls their weight.

Family nearby.

A flexible job.

Money.

All of it matters.

Women are constantly told to dream big while being shamed for the very support required to sustain those dreams.

We glorify the woman doing it all alone.

Then wonder why (or worse, shame her) she is drowning.

I’m not impressed by martyrdom anymore.

I’m impressed by women who build lives with enough support to stay sane.

Hot take #5: Balance is not something you win in a single day.

This is where I part ways with a lot of internet discourse.

People hear one quote, one schedule, one season and decide whether a woman is “doing it right.”

But balance is a macro goal.

Not a daily scorecard.

There are days I crush work and phone it in at home.

There are days I am deeply present with my kids and barely move my career forward.

There are weeks I feel like a superhero.

There are weeks where everyone gets a C-minus version of me.

That is real life.

The goal is not to perfectly split yourself into equal pieces.

The goal is to be intentional about where your energy is going and honest about what the season requires.

That is a much more mature conversation than “can women have it all?”

Because the real question is:

What does “all” even mean to you?

♟️ YOUR TURN:

If this conversation has stirred something up in you, here are a few questions worth sitting with:

What season am I actually in right now?

Not the season I wish I was in.

Not the season Instagram or the next millionaire internet guru wants me to be in.

The real one.

What am I sacrificing in this season?

Because success always costs something

The more honest you are about the cost, the less resentful you become paying it.

I'd love to hear your thoughts!! Reply back if your FYP was also filled with this discourt.

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