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The Fear Line

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Quick Spin:

• When fear motivates us vs. paralyzes us
• Signs you are operating below the line
• How Brené Brown uses this line at work and home

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♟️ MY TURN:

Let’s get real…

2025 has been full of fear.

Fear for the markets.
Fear for the rights of Americans.
Fear for job security.

That macro fear doesn’t even touch on the micro fear of day-to-day life.

• Fear my kids are ok as they go through a second divorce with their dad.
• Fear I’m not setting enough boundaries with technology for them and myself.
• Fear they aren’t doing enough activities, too many activities, not the right activities.
• Fear I'm not taking care of myself and lowering my stress.

And then I learned about the fear line from Brené Brown when I drove to Orlando a few weeks ago and heard her talk about it.

She differentiates between fear as a natural human response, and fear that becomes "armor," a self-protective mechanism that prevents us from being our best selves.

The "fear line" is the point where fear, instead of motivating us to act, paralyzes us and leads to self-sabotage or avoidance.

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When we're operating above the line, we can see things clearly, as they are, and are able to keep moving forward.

Above the line, we can operate as:

• a healthy challenger
• a creative
• or a coach

But….

when we are fall below the line…..

We fall into the triangle of sabotage (my words, not hers [Brené]).

When we fall below the line we start to act

• as the hero (must save everyone)
• the victim (no one will save me)
• Or the villain (it's time to sabotage)

If you find yourself saying things like:

• I know best.
• You’re wrong.
• People always do X to me.

Chances are….you are operating below the fear line.

A lot of work in leadership and life is knowing when you are operating above or below the line.

Brené told us a story about how they use this in meetings.

A direct report may say, “I feel like I’m dropping below the line.”

So they take a 10-minute break and come back.

Then Brené will ask what caused the person to start to drop below the line…

“Your intensity made it feel as if you didn’t think we cared as much as you and I started to feel as if I was a victim instead of your partner in making it happen”.

Leadership is all about potential.....

Being able to see clearly the potential for people and processes.

If you are operating below the line, you stop seeing potential.

Do you feel like you are dropping below the fear line a lot lately?

Keep reading.

♟️ YOUR TURN:

As you move through the rest of your week and weekend, start to picture the fear line and see when your operating from.

• What is causing you to drop below the line?
• Who do I need to communicate this drop to?
• What is within my control to bring me back above the line?
• What boundaries do I need to set to keep me from dropping?

We may not be able to control a lot of what is happening in the world, but you can control how much you allow it to paralyze you from impacting the things in your orbit.

Get back above the line and change one world.

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